That's right, friends. A year has passed and I have, yet again, bucked the odds and escaped without a single date. How can it be? Ah... I'm just that crafty, I guess. But now, with Valentine's Day approaching, this will simply not do. Therefore, it has come time to begin...

The 2nd Annual Be Danielle's Valentine Contest!!!

This contest was a raving success last year and I hope it will only grow in scope, creativity and popularity in this, the year of our Lord, Two Thousand and Seven.

The rules are pretty much the same:

So, I'm not the kind of girl who minds being single. Really. But what with all the god forsaken Valentine's Day stuff on tv, it's been on my mind. Thus, I decided I need a Valentine. Here's why I would make a great Valentine:

1. I'm not hideously unattractive. (Assuming I've showered and stuff... which is assuming a lot, but I'll do it for special occasions.)

2.You don't have to buy me anything. I do like presents that people find places, though... you know, like in pockets or the dark reaches of a closet. Spending money is not the point of this.


3. I won't force you to make out with me. (If you ask nicely, however... well, who knows?)

4. I'm very fun and have a terrific sense of humor.

5. It's ok if you don't actually live here and/or can't take me out on V-Day. It is also ok if you don't actually like ladies in a let-me-grope-you kind of way... though, be forewarned that I may grope you anyway.

So, there's really no pressure on you. All I ask is that you don't already have a Valentine... or at least that that person doesn't mind you taking on a pity case such as myself. And all you have to do is submit to me why you should be the winner. Be creative. Be fantastical. Be funny (do this the most). There are no parameters whatsoever.


For some idea on what I'm looking for, here was the winning submission from my 2006 Valentine, Jeff.:

"Being the 'guy who lives in NY' I have no problem being your valentine even though I haven't celebrated the day in years. I decided long ago to celebrate underwear day instead. It just involves wearing your favorite pair, that's all.
Aaaaaaanyway how about this. Since I'm sure an in-the-flesh valentine is always preferable to a virtual one I will act as backup. If you really can't find anyone to be your valentine, which I'm sure won't be the case, you will receive one or more of the following from me:
a)A wonderfully sappy greeting from an internet greeting card company
b)A mix CD of undetermined length where all the songs use the word "ramen"
c)a picture made in microsoft paint depicting the two of us
d)something else completely random
There ya go. I know this offer must be very enticing."

Incidentally, though, he only followed through on parts a (an e-greeting featuring a bear) and c (an MSPaint portrait that tickles me to this day), but he was a fine Valentine, nevertheless. Now, how will you top that?

Ready? GO!

Hey, y'all. So, I've been short on time and also a little gun-shy to write this blog. I feel like there is too much to write. Bah. I'll just jump in with both feet. Here goes.

Thursday, December 21st: Minnie-Twinnie Christmas with Brian O'Claus and Colleeny. I got some super-terrific presents from the most thoughtful gift-giver anyone knows and had a lovely dinner and saw a weird tiny snowman that someone built, dyed pink and placed on window ledge.

Friday, December 22nd: I got off work at 10 and drove down to my parents' house. It was sweet to drive down in the daylight hours and I had a couple of new cds to accompany me. I didn't really do anything once I got there.

Saturday, December 23rd: I went out with Mommy to shop and get mani/pedis, which was DE-FREAKING-LIGHTFUL. I need to get my feet rubbed more often. New Year's Resolution.

Sunday, December 24th: My parents, my little brother and I stayed at my Grandma's house the night before so we could leave for the airport at freaking 3AM. Eek. But I'd only slept for a couple of hours, so I was surprisingly perky. At the airport, one of my cousins threw up on the floor of the McDonald's three times. And then when we were walking to the gate, he threw up twice more in the bathroom. Then our plane was delayed a couple of hours. Suck. Then we got on the plane (my cousin threw up again) and found out an engine was broken or something and that it'd be fixed in 30 minutes. After 30 minutes, we had to get off the plane and get on another because it was apparently unfixable (more vomit). Finally, we took off around 9:30AM and had a sort of turbulent flight (vomit again). Then we shlepped our luggage all around Miami's shitty airport and finally, FINALLY got on the ship and had a nice dinner (vomit vomit vomit). It was a trying day, especially for my cousin, the vomitter. Poor kid.

The rest of the week included these high and lowlights:

* My cousin threw up a few more times, but eventually warded off the sickness with copious Dramamine and motion sickness bracelets.

* We went on a bus tour of San Juan that was led by a short, portly man in his 50's who was the queeniest queen of the Caribbean. He was super cracked-out, too, and I ate it up. I was pretty much the only one on the bus laughing at every single thing he said and this did not go unnoticed. He soon dubbed me the "Queen of the Cruise" and directed his whole "act" to me, which ended thusly: "If it's magic that you're seekin', get yourself a Puerto Rican". Amazing. When I got off the bus, he embraced me and kissed me on the face. I miss you, Manuel.

* I had never played a slot machine before, so my mom and I went to the on-ship casino one night. She gave me $20 and I put it in this game called "Ghoulish Gold". I didn't really know what was going on, but suddenly I got to a bonus round and the game just kept going by itself. And going. And going. In the end, I won $550. Freaking amazing. We split it, but not evenly. I kept $300 because it was my skillz that won it.

* Norwegian Cruise Line's thing is "Freestyle Cruising", meaning you can do whatever you want at whatever time you want. Neat. Our Cruise Director, Paul, for the entirity of the week, proclaimed thusly: "Now, THAT'S what I call Freestyle!" About everything. And nothing. Amazing.

* I saw some amazing/slightly cheesy cruise ship entertainment and loved every minute of it. Especially the Second City troup that was hilariously funny and contained a gentleman with whom I fell desperately in love. I tried to stalk him, but to no avail.

* My cousin (not the puker) loves doing karaoke and is quite a good singer, so we went to the karaoke lounge 3 or 4 times during the week. He and this other girl were always big hits. And then there was this other man, who was just... um... big. His name was Eli and he performed at least 5 times every night at the karaoke lounge. Sometimes, his wife would join him and they'd perform a ditty by Captain and Tenille, which was a real treat. Eli was a born shmoozer and before the end of the week, everyone on the ship knew him. My Second City boyfriend even referenced him in an improv they did (in reference to an incredibly annoying audience member).

* Every souvenir shop in the Caribbean is Pirate-Themed. SERIOUSLY. I loved that.

* I got a sweet tan and drank some delicious beverages and ate as much free food as I wanted all the time.

* My karaoke cousin competed in the talent show at the end of the week. Against Eli. Eli was kind of awful. My cousin was super awesome. Eli won. I loved it.

I think that's all the highlights from my trip... I'll add more if I think of any.

I returned on New Year's Eve (late - because, naturally, our flight was delayed 3 hours) and went over to my friend AJ's house. We were both dead tired and decided to watch the beautiful holiday classic Jingle All the Way. Seriously, this movie was HORRIBLE. Arnold Schwartzenegger is maybe the worst thing ever to happen to comedy. And whatever happened to Sinbad? Anyway, I kept nodding off before midnight, at one point spilling an entire glass of wine on myself, and then we went to bed. Low-key, but very nice, indeed.

Then I came home and spent time with my Minnie-Twinnie favorites, Colleen and Brian. I missed them and I missed home. But I did not miss winter. Or work. Boo.

The end. *Phew*

Hi friends!

I'm in 'Sconsin now. I got here in pretty good time, despite traffic, on account of my boss letting me leave work at 10am. Sweet. Of much more important news, tomorrow I'm having a girly day (mani/pedi, lunch, shopping) in preparation for Sunday, which is the day I leave for my



CARIBBEAN CRUISE

It is going to be the bestest thing ever. I'm SUPER excited. Seriously. While there, I intend to do as close to nothing as possible, with intermittent breaks to hunt for treasures to bring back to the mainland.

All you Wisconsinites should also take note of this: I'M SPENDING NEW YEAR'S EVE IN WISCONSIN. WE SHOULD WORK OUT A WAY TO SEE EACH OTHER'S FACES. THINK ABOUT. CALL ME.

My tummy and wallet are inextricably bound in their emptiness. Le sigh... so... hungry...

In better news, I did these things recently:

*Ate Thai food - Tum Rup Thai. Cool atmosphere! HUGE portions! Nummy!

*Ate Cuban food - Victor's. Mango pancake! Black beans! Bruncherific!

*Ate German food - Black Forest Inn. Good food! New friends! Guessing games! Breaking Creme Brulee with my spoon! Fun!

*Saw 10 Items or Less with Paz Vega (enchanting, made me want to be Spanish) and Morgan Freeman (completely cracked out, yet weirdly endearing).

*Went to a party. Met the John Command. He proved to be a bigger jackass than I'd imagined, but one of those ones that are funny to encourage sometimes.

Some of these activities were related to the anniversary of the birth of my Fun Time Buddy, Brian. It was a goal of mine to show him the world is happy he is alive and I think it was a success, despite one party guest being a total douchebag. I don't want to blog about any particulars, but seriously, the more I think about this dude, the more irritated I become...

Maybe it's the starvation talking...

LiveJournal? Hi. It's me. Sorry I have not been around for approximately eleventy million years. No! I have not been seeing another online community! I resent that insinuation. What kind of girl do you think I am? What?! What did that whore MySpace tell you? They're all lies, LJ, LIES. No, you don't have to tell MySpace I said that. In fact, don't even go over there. You won't like it. Not that I have anything to hide, of course. I love you LJ. I do.
What's that? Will I be back?
GOD, STOP SUFFOCATING ME!

I don't like snow. It makes me nervous to drive and the extreme cold makes my sad little car so much sadder. There is so much of it, it's hard to believe every morsel had practically melted away by yesterday. I think this'll be the last storm of the winter, though, and I love no season better than spring. So that's happy.

Additionally, a movie that I helped with that my friend made last summer won at a film festival - AMAZING! (View it here: http://ia300112.us.archive.org/1/items/The_Day_DreamerS/DayDreamers.mp4)
Also, my other friend is going to move to Nashville and be famous - AMAZING! All kinds of good things are happening to people I love and that makes me happy. Other happiness includes the jaw-dropping news that one of my favorite people in the whole wide world might be moving to Minnie-Twinnie. I mean, for now, it's a very, very vague possibility, but it still makes me really excited. AMAZING!

Hooray!

Hey, I'm going to California for a trip! I feel very spontaneous.

That's all.

P.S. Thank you to everyone for responding to my last blog. Your answers made me wiggle with happiness like a puppy.

First, I got cast in another show! Yay! It's called The Women and was described as "the best argument ever for male homosexuality" or something to that effect. It's about all these women being all back-stabby and bitchy and evil and funny. I will be playing 4 supporting roles. Sweet! I'm a little scared, though, because, as the title suggests, there are only women in this show (17 of them) and I normally do better with boys. I only have a handful of gal friends and that's because girls are eff-ing crazy most of the time... and not in a good way. But I'll give them all the benefit of the doubt for now.

And now, something copied from Colleen's blog that produced some fun answers:

1. What was your first impression of me?

2. What is something that I don't know about you? (This could be something that happened to you, a fact about you, or, you could make something up.)

3. Finally, how would you describe me to someone that has never met me?

Answer my questions so when I log on tomorrow I'll have lots to read and laugh and be happy about! Do it 'cause I said so.

So, normally I'm not the kind of girl who minds being single. Really. But what with all the god forsaken Valentine's Day stuff on tv, it's been on my mind. Thus, I decided I need a Valentine. Here's why I would make a great Valentine:

1. I'm not hideously unattractive. (Assuming I've showered and stuff... which is assuming a lot, but I'll do it for special occasions.)

2.You don't have to buy me anything. (Although no one's ever sent me flowers, FYI. If you need my address, ask my roommate...)

3. I won't force you to make out with me. (If you ask nicely, however... well, who knows?)

4. I'm very fun and have a terrific sense of humor.

5. It's ok if you don't actually live here and/or can't take me out on V-Day. Just knowing I have a Valentine will cheer me up.

So, there's really no pressure on you. All I ask is that you don't already have a Valentine... or at least that that person doesn't mind you taking on a pity case such as myself.

Any takers?

LJ Interests meme results

1. bright eyes:
   Bright Eyes = last summer = the best time of my life = the people I love most in the world.
2. crossword puzzles:
   Crossword-ing has led to my infallibility at Scrabble. And life.
3. folk music:
   I love music with really interesting and intelligent lyrical content. Ani is my fave because her words are so amazing and she kicks complete ass at the guitar.
4. innocence:
   No matter what happens to me in life, I really hope I can hang onto this. It is such a part of who I am and how I am.
5. love:
   No explanation needed.
6. pablo neruda:
   His poetry is so visceral and earthy and romantic and sexy and beautiful and amazing. Sonnet XVII...
7. project runway:
   I only wish I had cable so I could watch this regularly. Finally, a reality tv show that requires its contestants to actually possess talent and ingenuity.
8. scrubs:
   Simultaneously the funniest and most heart-rending show on television right now, for my money. Scrubs and The Office... both so unusual and real while being completely farcical.
9. stargirl:
   The best book ever written. Thematically, it is the meaning of my life.
10. the internet:
    All I do all day, for better or worse.

Enter your LJ user name, and 10 interests will be selected from your interest list.

I know, it's been a few days and I'm sure you've all been on the edge of your proverbial seats waiting for another installment of my blog. So here it is... now get off my back... if you were on it... which no one was...

Last weekend was delightful. It was the first weekend I had completely devoid of responsibility... so I basically did nothing. I went to see Brokeback Mountain and enjoyed it thoroughly... still need to see Capote and, if I have time before the Oscars, Transamerica. I loves me some Philip Seymour Hoffman and Felicity Huffman - both so underrated and so amazing. Hooray for them! I went out to eat a few times, which was fun. And on Sunday, I did a bunch of fun things. First, I started Colleen on watching the complete series of Sports Night on dvd that I bought used for super cheap (yay!). If you are a person who likes amazing things - and I know you are - I would like to show you this show. It is so eff-ing good... I normally wouldn't own tv shows on dvd because I don't think I'd revisit episodes I've already watched, but this was just as good now as it was when I originally watched it. Also on Sunday, I got my hair cut (one of my favorite things to do) and I went to an audition for Hay Fever. At the risk of jinxing it, I think it went really well. Call me a glutton for punishment, but I actually quite enjoy the audition process. It's exciting and, though it is a little scary not knowing what's going to happen next in my life, it also feels rather adventurous and I like that. So, I'm still waiting to hear back from that... I don't actually have a clear idea as to whether I'm being considered at all, but, if nothing else, I feel like it was probably the best audition I've done so far here.

I'm antsy right now. I'm at the library and I'm supposed to be researching plays for monologues to do at the Twin Cities Unified Theatre Auditions next month, but I HATE looking for materials and I want to go do something fun instead. But, then again, it is Monday. Do people do fun things on Mondays? I don't know.

So, as I posted yesterday, Cannibal has closed. The show went wonderfully last night with our biggest and best audience yet - there were people sitting in all the aisles and on the floor in front of the front row of seats. Craziness. Overall, I'm really happy to have been a part of this show. It was an overwhelming hit with audiences throughout the run and I even got paid yesterday - $75! Yay! It may not be a lot in reality, but I didn't expect to get any pay coming into it, so I'm really happy about it. Plus, I met some amazing people who I hope will remain my friends. All in all, a smashing success. Now I'm pleased to announce I'll be doing exactly jack shit every evening and weekend until further notice. But hopefully not much further. Anybody need an actress? I can't speak on my abilities, per se, but I can promise I'll be one of the most enthusiastic people on stage at any given moment. Just ask anyone who saw Cannibal.

Yes, today is the last day of the li'l show I'm doing. This brings about mixed emotions. On the one hand, I am sad because the show is sweet and fun and I've met all sorts of awesome new friends. On the other hand, I long for the days when my life was simple and even a little boring. I need a wee break. Hopefully it won't turn into an indefinite one.

The other day I had a dream that my mom was going to smoke crack. It was terrifying and left me with that weird feeling you get when a dream is really realistic. This one friend of mine in Cannibal! was the one trying to get her to do it and I felt ill at ease when I saw him the next day. Which is so funny considering how utterly innocuous and neat this person is in real life. Dreams are weird.

I don't think I've anything else to report for now...

Let me begin this edition of my li'l blog by saying I'm running on fumes. Very little sleep occured last night due to fun post-show shenanigans. Someday I'm sure I will become a big girl and know when to quit and go to bed, but for now, I just can't when people are doing fun things.

So, caffeine heart attack... I have been drinking coffee like it's going out of style today and I'm all twitchy now and my heart's beating sort of irregularly. Should this worry me? I say... no. And that I'll probably drink more before the day is out. Take that, cardiovascular system!

And, Suck Creek Dr... I normally don't pay attention to the actual text in the files I download at work, but today a particular real estate listing caught my eye. Yes, it was located on a Suck Creek Dr. I thought that was funny. So someone needs to move to Chattanooga, TN and live there so I can laugh about it.

Thirdly, I spread the word via inter-office mass email about Cannibal even though I don't actually know anyone here and immediately several people thought I was the coolest person they'd ever met. Sometimes it is fun to hang out with non-theatre-people... they seem to be fascinated by someone leading this kind of life... as though they are observing some kind of wild monkey who can speak on what it's like to be a monkey. They have lots of questions. I think that's funny.

Ok, enough babbling for now.

So, yeah, I totally got a new job. Rather abruptly, at that. Which is why very few of you know this news even though it's my second day today. Here's how it all went down. On Monday, I had an interview at Ye Olde Barnes & Noble Booksellers in Maple Grove. I forced myself to attend even though I really, really, REALLY hated the idea and, upon walking into said store and seeing customers milling about, I kind of wanted to vomit. The interview went ok... I was pretty lackadaisical about it. But then, whilst I was enjoying a meal at the world's most mediocre chain Italian restaurant with Colleen, I received a call from my new temp agency. She asked whether I'd be interested in a month-long position for $11.50/hr and I basically didn't listen to the rest and just accepted on the spot. So, yesterday was my first day and, I must say, this is the easiest fricking job ever. I sit at a computer all day and download real estate listings and photos from all these different websites and, while I wait for things to download, I play with LiveJournal and MySpace and generally glaze over. I literally do one eighth as much work here as at B&N and I get paid $3 more per hour. Amazing! Interesting how it all came together at the last possible second... I was getting rather anxious that I might actually have to try in order to get a job. Phew!

In other news, weekend #3 of Cannibal! starts tonight. If you haven't seen it yet and are in a position to do so... DO SO. Or, see it again if you have already. Because you love me, you know you do.

Today, I continue to be sick. But, I think I'm making a comeback overall. The death is draining out of me via my poor, defenseless red nose and, while I may look like a hideous mucous-y beast, I actually feel 65% better today.

In other news, after all my complaining, I'm interviewing at another Barnes & Noble on Monday. It hurt my pride to ask for a job opening at another store, as all along I've been turning down positions left and right thinking I'll find something better. But, in the end, I decided employed was better than unemployed and that I can keep up my job search whilst working rather than running out of money and having constant anxiety in the meantime.

So the show went wonderfully. High ticket sales Thursday, I think a near sellout on Friday and complete sellouts on both Saturday and Monday, well before curtain. Hotness. The crowds have been very responsive and laughy, too, which is awesome. Also awesome is the rumor I have heard that we are splitting the profits and I might make a dollar or two off of this biz. Huzzah!
On the unhappy side of life, I have a creeping death in me that is threatening to bring me down, but I'm refusing to let it. I am, however, in a whiny pathetic sick person mood. Hopefully this and my health improve tomorrow.
Additionally, all the books at my store have been sorted and will probably be done being shipped out tomorrow. This means my job will last no longer than approx. one week from today. Suck.

Things I like: Seeing my friends. My friends seeing a show I am in that is totally sweet. Playing games and drinking alcohol with said friends.
Things I hate hate HATE: Said friends leaving today. Not knowing when we will have a chance to reconvene. Crying. Feeling a little hungover. California.

I have been crazy busy what with working 10-6:30 everyday and then going immediately to rehearsals from 7-? every night. But my show opened last night and I soon will be unemployed, so... yeah.
Tech week was only mildly stressful. I don't actually understand people who worry that things won't come together in time for open. I've been in some much more disorganized shows than this one with much shorter rehearsal periods (i.e. summerstock at the Huron Playhouse) and it always somehow, despite all odds, turns out ok. And it did. The show went relatively smoothly last night, other than my tripping over and running headlong into the set during a scene change blackout... I'm a spaz. And afterward there was much revelling and fun-ness. In hindsight I realize that in my effort to get to know people in this show and make friends and such, I tend to talk way, way too much. I chauffered one such new friend around last night and I don't recall stopping to breath between sentences. I hope this does not make me seem self-absorbed. Even though I kind of am.
As for the job situation, I returned to MN to a closed place of business. We've been spending everyday sorting books, packing them up and shipping them out. Much to my dismay, this is going much faster than expected, bringing my impending joblessness ever nearer. I feel a deep sense of impending doom.
So, yeah, overall a hectic week. So much so that I took a sick day today because I felt like I'd been hit by a bus when my alarm went off. I was exhausted during the show last night and would kind of like not to be tonight. Plus I had all these little errands to run that I've not been able to do due to my schedule.
Blah blah blah boring update. The end.